Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I am going to Recover...right??

I mean really thats what the goal is here to be free of this demon that consumes my insides. SO I had a run in with the father in law monday..not good, as I was dropping my baby off to them so I could go to PHP to get better this is what from him...

"I am putting you on notice...I am sick of this crap, you need to grow up and be a mother, YOU need to cut this crap never get any better, you dont even try...and I read your phycological assesment...enough of this you need to pull it together cause we are done, plus you treat my son like crap"

to me he pretty much said you dirty bitch you are worthless and you dont deserve to recover, see you never will and this is all a waste of everyones time.

I need to put this out of my head cause its all I have been able to think about, it left a mark in my brain, I left thier house and had to drive a half an hour to PHP...crying ....fucking hysterically.

I will be back later...Zman is throwing up again...oh the joys of motherhood!



PTC said...

You will recover. You can do it and you have all of us to help support you.

belinda said...

1/ You bet your ass you are going to recovery honey, we both are!

2/ The father inlaw is NOT educated in mental illness, he is looking from the outside and can't see the leaps you are making (because you can't really see the healing of a mental illness). This always makes me fucking angry because it is comments like this that make you feel like giving up, right? BUT YOU CAN'T!!

because i will fly over & slap you silly, my girl! :p

on a more serious note:
i am really fucking sorry that you had to endure this ridiculous rant :( how did you go at php?
and instead of putting it "out of your head" can you process it, so that it no longer bugs at you? i am here and ready to listen!

i love you
keep fighting because I NEED YOU with me, right?? it is a deal!


firefly said...

Stupid Father-in-law. I'm so sorry that your father-in-law gave you such a hard time. I wish you could have called and I could support you.
You are strong and can get through this. We need to be healthy so we can really enjoy living. Hospitals etc is not a life. Put all you got into it now so you never have to go back. That's my motive for now.