Sunday, August 15, 2010
Zacks 6th birthday!!!
Zack I think for about 3.5 hrs forgot about everything but fun, it was a beautiful day. He was surrounding by about 20 friends, swimming, bouncing on a 30ft, bounce and slide ( water sprays out the top so when you run and slide...you slide 30 ft, down on your belly into the other end of the bounce wall) eating cotton candy ( yes I rented a cotton candy machine learned how to use it...thinking my next job will be at a carnival :) ) opening gifts and eating cake...he just ran around and played..he had fun, we all did.
It was a very good day thrown in amoung to many bad ones, but as the last guest left, reality hit him, his saddness and anger was back...and he uttered these words "I dont have a dad, I dont care mommy...I dont care who you find, I just want a dad.." and my heart broke again for 500th time over the last 5 months.
Fun is all well and good, but if I could heal his heart I would give every penny I have....just to see my boy smile at the sun....just because...well its there.
I love you Zack, I will forever do what I can to see you happy again...one day you feel peace and joy just because...and until then..I will do whatever it takes.