but i cant things are going to well
But I hate my body
maybe if I just lose a little wieght, just a little.
I cant stand my body did I say I CANT STAND MY BODY!!!!!!!!
I keep trying to figure out how to coexist in a body that isnt mine, this isnt me its way to fat, and this is not a distortion, i have gained well and beyond what was needed to be healthy and it doesnt seem to be stopping, WTF. How does it happen that one goes from being to thin to to fat, like that.WTF again.
okay why do I not want to forego recovery in hopes to achieve the perfect and I say perfect like that cause it never is perfect and everyone knows it.
1) cause my kids are 1st in my life now and I think they like it better that way
2) cause I can eat at a wedding and NOT freak out
3) cause no one stares and says " what does she have cancer"
4) cause me and M arent fighting over food
5) cause I can eat pizza at chuck e cheeses withteh kids
6) cause I can talk about real issues with S instead of just how fat I am
7) cause my team actually wants to see me and I get to tell them good news instead of being told I need to be in hospital
8) cause no one spends thier days worrying if I will die durning it
9) cause I actually remember playing with my kids instead of counting calories while they play
10) cause I actually have a list of why Recovery rocks
why does Ed suck
Cause he steals those other 9 things away from me
okay okay so recovery Rocks and Ed sucks but I am still fat