Wildwood here we come!!

The kids and I will be leaving for our Trip to wildwood tomorrow..its like a 6 to 7 hour drive ( with 3 kids 7 and under and just me) BUT I cant wait, to get outa here, to just hang out and be with my kids, to chill by the beach, head to ALL the amusement parks ( you can buy one ticket at a special price for each person and go to all the amusement/water parks on Motrie peir) So thats what we are doing, YEAH!!!!The resort we are staying at is called The port Royal Hotel,http://portroyalhotel.com if you want to check out where we will be chilling :) and The Boardwalk, Yeah, I have never been so I pretty excited...This trip also has special meaning, I mean we could went anywhere, flown somewhere exotic, but Mike and I had always planned on taking the kids there, its where he spent many a summers as a child and he wanted them to experiance what he did...The kids know Daddy went there allot when he was kids , but they dont know about how we had made plans to take them there when Isaiah turned 3, well now hes 3 so I m taking them, it will in part be bittet sweet...I think I will take some time out for a couple hours one day and go to the beach myself ( they have activites that you can enroll the kids in for a few hours so you can have some adult time, so they will have fun and I can well just reflect some)

It was the same with The indoor water park, we had always planned to take them...everything when Isaiah turned 3 so they could all enjoy it...Hes missing allot, but I think he would be happy knowing I am carrying out our plans...

Not to be a downer but I think its super hard right now because I am so conflicted by so many things, he hurt me allot, but I loved him and always had hope he would change, he worked so hard but we never had any money, he spent allot on alcohol, and I had so many medical bills...allot of money "diappeared" but thats a whole different story with allot of assuptions so I wont go there...and NOW, my hope has been shattered, he will never be back, and now I have money ( Not like Im a millionare but enough, a hell of allot more then I ever had when he was here) Allot of the time it feels like blood money, but I know he did what he did ( before he died) to provide for us, I dont spend the money on me, I spend it on doing things with/for the kids ( with the exception of the car, but we all needed that cause mine was getting dangerous and sucking heaps of money from me)...anyway I suppose this should all be in a different post...

I am so looking foward to getting away, fun, sun, my kids what more could a girl ask for...and you know what Im actually looking foward to the food, I hear they have GREAT seafood, as its right by the water and I love seafood especially fresh, cooked the way I like, plus as wierd as it is I usually eat better when Im not at home, I dont know what it is, different atmoshere...I feel less pressure, and Im not labeled by anyone who doesnt know as the sick chic!!!

So we wil be back Friday night late, and even though I rarely comment anymore I read ALL your blogs regularly so even if you dont know it I will miss you all greatly.

So my computer does things backwards and even though I wrote this all first Im sure the pics will come up first, then the post, anyway I am putting up somem pics...FINALLY of our trip to Lake george...

Love always Tara