tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post1855224260296744656..comments2023-10-23T14:50:26.376-04:00Comments on the struggle within: In DeepZenahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-4082483557104749982008-12-11T12:51:00.000-05:002008-12-11T12:51:00.000-05:00KB, thanks for stopping by...its means allot that ...KB, <BR/>thanks for stopping by...its means allot that I have your support and encouragement. I have tryed to make a new plan with my N today to add one food from her list per day til i reach a certain level but right now i m not so sure I can do ...I am going to have some chicken broth right now...hopefully there are some nutrients in chicken broth....ugh this is so hard.<BR/><BR/>SArah, I will call you later how are you doing??<BR/><BR/>love, ZZenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-41263709631645299182008-12-10T23:00:00.000-05:002008-12-10T23:00:00.000-05:00Zena,I know that I've been not at all around, but ...Zena,<BR/><BR/>I know that I've been not at all around, but I wanted to see what's up with you and I'm so very sorry that you are struggling.<BR/>I know that I don't *know* you, not like others here do and not like people in real time, but I can relate to the suffering and all that you are going through. At the same time, you have to make a decision. Even if the decision is that you can't take it anymore.<BR/><BR/>- KristinaKristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17208374967597840745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-15996379218792920782008-12-10T22:59:00.000-05:002008-12-10T22:59:00.000-05:00Zena: Stop beating yourself up. You can do this gi...Zena: Stop beating yourself up. You can do this girl. I have faith in you!Call me anytime. Is it possible to look at your mom as support more then food police?fireflyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02443020437138183849noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-13196073690839202922008-12-10T09:09:00.000-05:002008-12-10T09:09:00.000-05:00I am scared all the time this sucks I am feeling d...I am scared all the time this sucks I am feeling dizzy and scared not a good combo. Had a good session with S yesterday and I did manage to eat some eggs for dinner, she wants me to be nicer to my emotional side since I am always beating the crap out of myself...its sad really that I hate myself so much I just wish I could love me for me.<BR/><BR/>my mom is back from florida and again she is on the food police role, I hate it but shit I guess I need it...Im so sad.<BR/><BR/>Love, ZZenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-62454228361270733152008-12-09T12:30:00.000-05:002008-12-09T12:30:00.000-05:00Not closed, just private.Not closed, just private.PTChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05377666179155825301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-69492027464994263082008-12-09T07:59:00.000-05:002008-12-09T07:59:00.000-05:00Yes, you don't have access? Big disasters over at...Yes, you don't have access? Big disasters over at Just Babbling. Shoot me an email. thepalmtreechick@yahoo.comPTChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05377666179155825301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-43989369250965552272008-12-09T05:08:00.000-05:002008-12-09T05:08:00.000-05:00Stay focused.Stay focused.Leon1234https://www.blogger.com/profile/12707501065021550093noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-63672401315817273542008-12-09T02:30:00.000-05:002008-12-09T02:30:00.000-05:00breathe honey breathehave you tried some meditatio...breathe honey breathe<BR/>have you tried some meditation?<BR/>i know it is hard, especially when you feel like you are climbing the walls.<BR/>i'm here<BR/>keep fighting with me darling<BR/><BR/>xbelindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01130794351120140046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-31898598871486479482008-12-08T21:45:00.000-05:002008-12-08T21:45:00.000-05:00Zena: Things sound like you are in a very scary pl...Zena: Things sound like you are in a very scary place. Please try to stop this relaspe. I know its hard but you can do it!!!!fireflyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02443020437138183849noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-32923843362366986612008-12-08T10:19:00.000-05:002008-12-08T10:19:00.000-05:00PTC, Did you close up your blog??Daft, Thanks for ...PTC, <BR/>Did you close up your blog??<BR/><BR/>Daft, <BR/>Thanks for your comment, but I m not allowed to exercise even walking, but that sounds like a good idea.<BR/><BR/>love, ZZenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-39466216104702976622008-12-08T07:15:00.000-05:002008-12-08T07:15:00.000-05:00Z, it really sounds like you need to go back IP. ...Z, it really sounds like you need to go back IP. Do you really want to go through all of this pain everyday? It's not worth it and it can kill you.PTChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05377666179155825301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-75376322187942723122008-12-07T22:39:00.000-05:002008-12-07T22:39:00.000-05:00darling girl,you need to nourish yourself and thos...darling girl,<BR/>you need to nourish yourself and those minimal numbers you mentioned are going to leave you feeling agitated and unfulfilled.<BR/><BR/>this IS all very serious. and i hope you can take your life and health seriously honey. this is your heart we are talking about - so much more important than cals, weight & shape.<BR/><BR/>what are you going to do?<BR/><BR/>love you!<BR/>xobelindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01130794351120140046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-11062936628542669232008-12-07T18:54:00.000-05:002008-12-07T18:54:00.000-05:00Hey Z,I am so sorry to hear this. I agree with Zu,...Hey Z,<BR/>I am so sorry to hear this. I agree with Zu, the kids could definitely be reaching out to you. As for some healthy step, I don't think I have anyhing to offer you haven't heard. One thing that helps me, even though it is just minor, is a walk outside, and a hot shower followed by putting myself together so I can like how I look. If nothing else it calms you down a little.<BR/>You can take control. You can be the master of your own mind. You can have the life you and your family deserve. <BR/>So do what it takes. Therapy? Dietician? Self-Help books? Medication? <BR/>Sending love, update soon.<BR/><BR/>xKimXDaftDragonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09144816448694995397noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-24156944453655184202008-12-07T17:15:00.000-05:002008-12-07T17:15:00.000-05:00well I had to fat free hot dogs around 4 and now I...well I had to fat free hot dogs around 4 and now I feel like shit, I ahve got to get this AN under control but evry day that passes I seem to become more entrenched. I spoke to S we emailed back and forth a couple of time and she explained that living in this choas will only get worse that my fears will only become greater and I will soon need outside help...Im scared folks this relaspe has come up so fast, Im already losing wieght, which in itself isnt a bad thing cause Im fat but its happening pretty fast and Im scared at how quickly my heart could fail, I need to take some healthy step but I dont know whatI just dont know what to do...sigh....<BR/><BR/>ZZenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-54503911367121008412008-12-07T09:18:00.000-05:002008-12-07T09:18:00.000-05:00I dont know what to do...no food today...none exce...I dont know what to do...no food today...none except chicken broth...arggg...this sucks<BR/><BR/>ZZenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857291235181694200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-49697227876969320122008-12-06T21:39:00.000-05:002008-12-06T21:39:00.000-05:00Hey Tara,It does sound like you and m are not in c...Hey Tara,<BR/>It does sound like you and m are not in control anymore. I wish I could come in with the kids and take care of them.You need to get some more help. What about iop before it gets any worse?God I know how easy and tempting it is to get pulled into A but its not worth it. There are so many issues going on behind the A but you can't focus on those until you aren't using behaviors. Thanks for listening tonight! Talk to you tomorrow afternoon. Maybe three or four here. Love ya, Sarahfireflyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02443020437138183849noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709375526155793906.post-28609689151550738742008-12-06T20:07:00.000-05:002008-12-06T20:07:00.000-05:00oh hon, what a horrible situation. But look, babe,...oh hon, what a horrible situation. But look, babe, you have to see how your kids' behavior is affected by you and M. You know, your little girl shouldn't have to be thinking about whether she tells her Gran about your hospital status... I mean, sweetie, maybe she is screaming out for some help here. I know you won't want to hear this, and I know it will sting, but Z, this breaks your family apart. <BR/><BR/>You have a choice. There isn't a voice outside of you telling you not to eat... this is your brain, your thoughts. They are old tapes and you have the power and ability to choose to eat.<BR/><BR/>What are you going to do, buddy?zubeldiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540610591568098744noreply@blogger.com